Tom Cruise has made it big as an action hero in the past decade or so. If you’ve seen that behind the scenes video where he breaks his ankle during a stunt attempt for “Mission Impossible,” you’ll know just how these soulless movies get a reboot.

I’m a ‘90s baby, and honestly, despite all the hype, I have never wanted to watch “Top Gun.”

But, I watched it so you don’t have to go through the ordeal of watching endless establishing shots while airplanes give us more chemistry than the actual love interests. Let’s break it down then.

I’m 15 minutes into the movie, and the aircrafts have more screen time than any of the actors combined. Maverick (Tom Cruise) and his flying buddy Goose (Anthony Edward) encounter some hostile aircrafts which turns into an epic cat and mouse chase. This ends up giving them an opportunity to join Top Gun. It’s like the Ivy League but for the Navy. Kids, do not, I repeat DO NOT ride a bike without a helmet like our buddy Mav. Safety, cool. Mav, stupid.

Then comes the quintessential Marine’s frat party scene. Right off the bat, our hero is creepy af. All while singing “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’” to impress a girl he just met. Later, following her into the Ladies’ room. Yikes! Borderline stalker behavior but who cares right? It was the ‘80s and romanticizing problematic behaviors were a thing but IRL he’d get a restraining order.

He finds out that she’s his instructor, Charlie (Kelly McGillis). Now, that makes her even more irresistible to Mav who goes on to pursue her. Miss Charlie reciprocates whilst omitting his aggressive tactics from her report. Girlfriend here legit asks him out on the test paper. Education-0 Forbidden romance-1.

Feeling a little too encouraged, Mav the man-child lives recklessly for another 40 minutes which results in the tragic death of our beloved underdog, Goose. While I love me some “character development” for the lead aka Mav, I also don’t love killing off comic reliefs. But, c’est la vie! If you’re wondering why I didn’t mention Val Kilmer, I’ll let you know that he wasn’t even the bad guy here.

Mav then goes from a reckless to a recluse to a redeemer, all in 1.5 hours. It’s a happy ending of course. Mav gets the girl and the graduation. It is also revealed that Mav’s recklessness was a manifestation of his dad’s ‘notorious’ reputation which his commander debunked. So, if he knew before he would’ve been good? Without which we wouldn’t have had this movie. 
In conclusion, I didn’t know Berlin’s “Take My Breath Away” would steal the show even though the love story and aircraft chemistry couldn’t. I wonder if the sequel will be able to salvage this mess.

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